Work Ethic Level: Dreamer

I have had about three posts saved into my drafts on here for about a month yet. They will become solid posts... eventually. I'm taking 16 credits (it's weird, I know) this semester and it has been difficult for me to adjust back into work mode after an entire month on Christmas break. I'm in the middle of my third week of my second semester (crazy, right?!) and it has flown by so far! I got back to school on January 20 and my roommates and I immediately started planning spring break with a few other people. Sadly, the house that we found on Oak Island in North Carolina will not rent to us if we don't have someone that is at least 25 stay with us for the whole week - this kind of works out, though because I'm my brother's confirmation sponsor. Anyways, that's basically what's been going on with me. Oh! And I have my first "college crush" as juvenile as that sounds. He's super sweet, but it's nothing... bummer... Oh well, it is what it is.

Oak Island, NC

As I said earlier, I have been struggling to get back into school mode this semester. I have had my emotions all over the place and I really cannot seem to sit down and crank anything out until around 2 am which is probably why my emotions are scattered everywhere. Basically everything has been crazy since I got here. Literally, since I got here... As soon as I got back to school I went over to a friend's house and she fixed my hair (I had a very, very bad dye job) so I didn't even get to really unpack that day. I unpacked a little, but I did more socializing than anything else. On top of that I have been sleeping in my other roommates' room because my roommate's boyfriend would stay over... it was an inconvenience to say the least, but I think that's behind on us now.

Getting organized this semester has been a huge struggle too. Not only with classes, but with my personal possessions. Every time I sit down to get my life cleaned up (i.e. map out my week, clean, do laundry, etc) something happens. Like a couple Saturdays ago I was woken by the fire alarm because there was a fire in my building... ugh! After being misplaced for about an hour we could finally get to our stuff. It's safe to say that I ended up watching a Law and Order marathon with one of my roommates.

Christmas: What I Want

So, I've been trying to play catch up with my English assignments... I have to create a blog about my hometown and I'm losing steam quite quickly. Losing my creative edge today caused me to take a break and make my Christmas list. You know, the thing my dad has been asking for for about a month now. I'm a little very lazy and so I just did it on Pinterest. Granted I know I won't get all of it, but there are things on my list that I really want/need. So here goes:

Christmas Wishlist 2013

1. 8" Bean Boots

I'm from Erie, PA, our slogan is "feel the lake effect" as in lake effect snow. I need every inch I can get when it comes to boots.

2. Monogram Earrings

I'll take them in gold, please! Find them on Three Hip Chicks at a fabulous price.

3. J. Crew Factory shearling slippers

They come in "Vibrant Coral" and "Navy"

4. Navy Shep Shirt

I'm convinced I need it to survive 

5. Kate Spade Sticky Note Set

I love Kate Spade and I love sticky notes.. it's a gift made in heaven! 

If you want to see what else is on my list go on and check it out on my Pinterest! 

What's on your Christmas wishlist?

Stuff the Turkey & Deck the Halls: Looking Back on Holidays Past

I know, I've been AWOL for what, two weeks? I think. I know I was playing with Jackson last time I posted. I have a good excuse though, I was in New York last weekend so I didn't have time to post. But really I've been swamped with school and I'm super lazy and there was some family drama and yeah. Excuses, excuses, excuses. I'll fill yinz in later though, deal? Not like you care... #awk

New York City last week - had to go to the Lilly store!

The holidays are finally truly upon us! According to the stores Christmas was a go as soon as everyone was back in school, but to all of us that don't have to sell plastic Santas and faux Christmas trees to keep our companies afloat the holidays start as soon as the first 30 pound turkey is purchased and thawed. I have been anxiously awaiting for Monday since I got back from the city late Saturday night and it's almost here. I actually told my dad that my Thanksgiving break starts on Monday instead of Tuesday because the only thing I have on Tuesday is my English and it's basically like 98% cancelled (that's not possible, but whatever) so I leave after my last class on Monday... I will have 5 o'clock on the brain all day!

It's snowing here in good, old Clarion today and so I've opened the blinds and sat down with my trusty laptop and some hot cocoa, turned on some Christmas music and mentally preparing for the train wreck that the upcoming festivities will be. I look forward to Christmas and Thanksgiving every year and every year they get harder and harder. I guess when your mom's last Thanksgiving and Christmas are spent in a hospital bed getting fed through a tube you really can't go back. People end up yelling, I almost got kicked out of my house last Thanksgiving, and my dad came really close to disowning me last Christmas. So, we'll see what this holiday season has in store for me - trust me, if I could skip them I would.

Here's what I am excited about though:

All of the fun holiday outfits, Honey Baked Ham... I actually hate ham, but I love their sugar-coated turkey, looking at all of the tacky Christmas lights (are colored bulbs really necessary?), and of course the baking! I love, love, love being on my feet for hours and getting the most amazing cookies and cakes in the end (P.S. I'm not an avid sharer.)

I seriously snack on this and eat it cold and it only lasts me a day, it's turkey

And now some holiday memories:
Just kidding, how about some quick photos from one, single Thanksgiving?

My favorite Thanksgivings are always the ones spent in New York. I honestly won't watch the Macy's Parade unless I'm physically there... mostly because I get bored.

Santa at Macy's Thanksgiving Parade - 2011

I also adore the Rockette's. Like, I wish I could be one, but I'm too short and can't get my leg up high enough anymore (boo for no more dancing this year)

Blurry, but it's my favorite part!

And every time we spend Thanksgiving in the city I ALWAYS go see Santa at Macy's (even if I have to drag whomever is with me)

Lastly, I just found this picture today, but every Christmas my cousin, Beth, comes in from Florida and we always do fun stuff and always end with a picture in front of the fireplace at my Grandma's house.

Me, my dad, Beth, Mike, & Billy - January 2012

I had to include this one, it's from Christmas Eve last year and it represents the relationship that my brothers and I have beautifully

GL, Mike, Billy, and I - Christmas Eve 2012

What are some of your favorite holiday memories? Any traditions that you love? One of my favorite traditions is getting new pajamas on Christmas Eve after mass.

Better With Age

When I was younger I used to think that  I would never mature. Seriously, when I was six I would panic that I would never grow up - that I would always watch Disney Channel and play Barbie's and sleep with my doll, Baby Sandy. I thought that I would never turn into my parents. I thought that I would never be able to be a mom because I couldn't grow out of my childhood. I assumed I would never be able to keep my room clean and organized without my mom's help. I was so wrong and I realized that as I was making my bed this morning (I didn't even start doing that until college) and it hit me, I've only gotten better with age.

Do you know what else that I realized? I realized that some people don't get better with age - they turn into sour milk instead of fine wine. There are people out there that are my age, but they behave the same way that I did when I was nine. It's so strange to realize that some people are growing and maturing while others are growing, but remaining the same.

I'm not sure what made me get my life together. Maybe it's the life experiences that I've had or maybe it simply is just chalking more years up. My birthday is in April and it didn't even hit me until last night that legally I am adult. I sat there in disbelief wondering who on earth would let me become an adult. It's so strange that I can do anything I want - I can get tattooed with out my father's permission or even get married if I really wanted to. Granted I won't do any of those things right now, but the option is there if I ever want to. It's actually quite funny how it hit me that I'm an adult last night; my younger brother told me that  I should have taken my other little brother to see Bad Grandpa last night since I could get him into the theatre. I think that alone tells me that I'm really not ready to be an adult (and neither is he, but in less than a year he will be.)

Truthfully, I'm not ready for this "new found freedom" I'm in no way prepared for it. In a few years I'll be graduated from college and onto even bigger things... like the real world, oh my! I want to go back to 17, it was only a few months ago, but it feels like it's worlds away. To think that this time last year I was a senior in high school who couldn't wait to get out of Erie and move to New York. My life is in a completely different place than I thought it would be, but it's happening for a reason. A reason that I may learn of when I'm older... maybe I'll be a whiskey instead of wine.

I'm signing off now though because Jack is trying to type for me and close the laptop and eat some quarters. I hope you too become a fine wine instead of sour milk.

Online Friendships

As soon as I published the hair post yesterday I got on Tumblr and shared that I made a new post (just like always) and the first thing that came up was a Skype ad. It was seriously so emotional. I'm in love with this ad. Skype introduces you to two girls that live in different countries, but were brought together at birth by the parent's because they were both born with one arm. They never met in person until years later and even lost touch for awhile. I can't say enough to get you to watch it. So... WATCH IT! This is the best ad that I've ever seen and so yes, yes, yes just watch it!

This was one of the sweetest things I've ever seen on friendship. Watch and cry and love.

Dreaming Big: Hair

Anyone that knows me knows that I cannot do hair to save my life. It doesn't matter if it's your hair or my own, the most I can do is straighten it and even that is questionable. I used to be able to curl my hair, but it seriously took me six hours and it never looked that great; like by the time I finished it looked like I hadn't brushed my hair in days! I watched College Prepster's tutorial on how to use the Dry Bar's 3-Day Bender curling iron and for a while I thought maybe I could use it and I even considered shelling out the money to buy it, but then I reminded myself that I can't do my hair to save my life - it doesn't matter products I use.

I also love, love, love dying my hair. I don't go to the salon to get it done (I rarely even go for a trim..oops) because I truthfully don't have the patience to schedule appointments and pay all of the money and I have more fun just doing it with my friends in one of our bathrooms. Before school started Jackie, Joanne, and I dyed our hair in Joanne's bathroom and Joanne's hair is the only one that worked (which is funny to us because of the events that led up to it) and Jackie and I were trying to go lighter. We found it odd that there was no bleach necessary so I mean it wasn't a big shock to us. I dyed my hair red back in April/May, it was one of those months, I really don't recall which. My friend, Becky did it for me though and it turned out great! I'm looking forward to dying it back to that color at some point because I loved being a red head!

Before

After (I went with a dark red)

And yes, I took the awkward before and after selfies. I love them so very much and I found these in an old imessage with Becky. Oh and Becky and I have been friends since second grade and I miss her, she's gone through a lot with me. She's at Saint Francis University right now and she's just an awesome person. We have had our differences literally every year, but still. 

Me & Becky before Junior Prom (2012)

What do you like to do with your hair? Do you struggle like I do when it comes to doing your hair?

Finding Your Groove

I've been at school for a little over two months now and though I haven't made many friends yet, I have met a few really great people. However, I'm still working on "finding my groove" here. It's normal, but I'm not okay with it. When I was a freshman in high school I figured everything out within the first month. Sure I can navigate around the campus fairly easily, but because my schedule is so weird I find it hard to really settle down and study. 

In high school it was school, rowing, and dance. For the first year it was in that order, but sophomore year it changed to rowing, school, dance. No, that wasn't the list of my priorities - okay, it was a little, but I had school at the top. Seriously, there was a hospital visit junior year because I was addicted to school work and wouldn't stop rowing or dancing. It wasn't pretty, but I came out of it stronger than ever and even my grades improved.

College is different though. I expected it to be, but I didn't think I would have such an easy time and struggle as much as I have. The work has been easy - my grades have proved that - but getting myself to hunker down and get the work done is still a work in progress. I love doing work. It's weird, but I'm so excited to graduate and become married to my job and run on little sleep. I thrive on it and right now I don't have that. I have too much time and so I'm not biting my nails trying to figure out when things will get done, but rather when I'm going to force myself to have some self control and turn off Gossip Girl (I finished season five today.)

I'm not sure where exactly this post is taking me, but I do know where I want to take it. The problem is getting there. 

I decided about a week ago that I need to go easier on myself since it is my first semester at college in a new town (I'm from a city so this is very new to me) so I'm kind of trying to dip my toes in rather than dive in head first. This doesn't give me an excuse to skip class though. I slept through my 9:30 class both days last week and my professor pulled me aside to see if I was okay and if I needed someone to talk to when really the only problem I'm willing to admit is that I can't sleep at night which means that I can't wake up in the morning. 

This is so scattered in my mind, I have about a million things running through my mind right now and I want to grab them and place them in front of me so that I can see it all. That's what lists are for, but they don't really work on me. Anyways, when I say find your groove I just mean find what works for you and go with it. Even if changes, roll with it. Do what you think is best for you and chances are you'll rock at it.

And with that, I leave you with a book suggestion that I too am planning on reading over break that I really should have read years ago. Probably about five years ago my dad bought me a book called How to Become a Straight A Student by Cal Newport. I'll be reading it over Thanksgiving and Christmas break, do you care to join me?